IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT 'ME'...

Being 'au fait' as readers of me blog tend to be, they realize that what this old geezer writes about is LIFE.  Life that is seen through me eyes and lived, imperfect at times, but still lived.

However difficult life is at times, one is constantly amazed at how oft the door of opportunity swings open and begs one to have the courage to venture through that door.

Some time back, the old geezer took to the road of life in search of his 'safe harbour', a place where one could knock the dust of heavy times from trainers and collect thoughts and try to find inner peace.  A place to feel welcome and safe.  It would seem that relief from the burdens of everyday life comes at one from unexpected corners.  One never knows truly what lies ahead, round the next corner or in the welcome offered by a new friend in life.

I am lucky.  There always seems to be someone who takes a shine to and makes the journey worth the taking and all the more likely that one will come away with a much better feeling of self and a renewed joy in life. 

If one takes the time to listen to the stories told round one, one hears many a tale that mirrors one's own fight to make sense of life.  The mystery that seems to baffle one is really no mystery at all, the challenge of living life is one faced by more that self.  The trick seems to be to realize that some face the challenge better and come away the better for it.  That is not to say that scars are not got from the battle.

I have met  persons of late who makes me stop and take stock of what frightens me, what holds me back and what makes me feel low at times.  Some have led exemplary lives.  Had a life's work that provided a good living and provided a good retirement.  Most punched ticket in all of the right places.  Paid taxes, cared about community and tried to right what wrongs seen as they travelled down the road of life.

That is not to say that some have not suffered the tragic in life.  Paid a heavy price for being true to self.  Family was not as supportive as one would have liked and choices in who to love did not provide with a union that lasted all of their days.

The wounds received in one's youth tend to be the ones that never really heal proper.  They come back to haunt later in life.  Truth be told, this old geezer knows that all too well.

What should be the 'golden' period of life, is filled with much depression.  One wonders what it has all been for and what lies ahead.  As clever as one appears to be, one tends to think that there should be more.  As if there is still the possibility that days will be filled with the loudness of Christmas and Fourth of July.  There has to be more.
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The battle to make sense of what is now and what one hopes for is huge.  So thick is the smoke of battle that one tends to not see what already has been granted and to appreciate the bounty of it all.

In the past I have banged on about what ails me.  Some would think a little too loudly.  May well be more truth to that than am willing to lay claim to at times.

Whatever my problems, they are not so unique.  All one has to do is listen to voices round to know that we all suffer loss and want.  There are dark days enough to go round many times over.  Mind, one has to remember that the the sun always come back out.  So dark it is not that a ray of light does not brighten the future.

I oft wonder what is the point of life.  There have even been times that the thought of suicide seemed a perfect end to problems faced.  The cloud of depression is not unknown to me.

It may well be that the trick of me life is to be here for folks met who need to realize that however dark the present moment is, there are brighter days ahead.  Having faced so very many dark days, I know that to be so very true.  In some small way it might be possible to lend a helping hand to another in need of bucking up.

Life is not just about ME.  A life worth living is one that shares AND remembers that life lived is not a solitary experience.

I hope that my new friends chase away the ghosts of the past and comes to see the beauty they add to my world, because they have a place in it.